turning points?

Who has been watching the RNC and DNC on TV? Great oratorical speeches, great idelogical principles, who can argue with either- when it is presented so skillfully?

Do you just follow the leader?

Do you just think what everyone else thinks and stick with it regardless of where it leads? Do you realize where your thinking came from? Or when it is solid or where it gets shaky? What happens when you are confronted with something you never thought of? Or never had cause to consider??

What kind of signs do you require to change course? A red buoy? A flashing light? A loud siren? A crying woman? A shocking revelation? A painful experience? A surpising twist of events that no one could see coming? Does it take a blinking beacon or a crash on the bloody rocks? A “graveyard” experience?

Resisting a turning point, doesn’t change the facts.

Ignoring them, just exposes you unnecessarily.

Have you ever known people who provoke you to think? Have you known people who are rigid in their thinking? How would you view the polarization of people based on how they view a subject or align themselves with a particular political party or take positions based on their way of thinking?

Recently, I have experienced a couple of significant “turning point” moments. What qualifies? Something that causes you to “rethink” or change course or find a course. Have you said or heard someone close say, “I have no direction.” No direction? What does that mean?

Do they have a compass? Surely, a sailor does not set sail without a compass or GPS or chart to set the course based on serious direction. Direction helps us avoid those unmarked posts and uncharted waters. How many boyscouts set off on a camping trip without their direction? How many of us are feeling they had a direction and things seemed perfectly clear ahead, but now this direction dissipated- vanished in thin air???

Are you an open book?
Or a blank page?
Do you think linear?
Do you think?
Do you want to?

At weddings- hmmmm- we all wonder what lies ahead? Ahead for the couple, ahead for the family, ahead- across the waters, beyond this day and this horizon.

 

 

What constitutes good thinking and bad thinking? Good direction or bad direction? Isn’t some thought or some direction better than none?? Or is it?

In cognitive behavioral therapy, the counselor is charged with helping the client change their way of thinking, therefore changing their life experiences and life choices. We are having an internal dialgoue with ourselves 24/7.

Having these kinds of conversations with yourself is perfectly normal and in fact, everybody does it. The problem is when we let these conversations take on a life of their own. If our thoughts are unchecked, they can go unbidden. Recently, I saw a Dr. Phil show on a bulimic 28 year old who weighed 60 pounds. A beautiful slender active 9 year old weighs 65 pounds. Can you visualize this? This young woman allowed her thinking to control her life. She was an example of “stinkin’ thinkin’.” Her thoughts had taken on an unhealthy attitude, one that many of us experience in different forms but is always working against us instead of for us. Psychologists would call these thoughts “irrational,” because they have little or no basis in reality. For instance, the reality is that most everyone is loved by someone (even if they’re no longer with us), and that a lot of our beauty springs from inside us — our personality and we can get past ANY unfortunate event. What you face- you can erase!

What kinds of “stinking thinking” derail us? All or nothing- it’s all black or white- if we can’t have it all, we don’t want anything limits you and your options. If we overgeneralize, one single event like not being chosen for a particular job, causes people to launch into “I always or I never” kinds of sentences. Stop it!! Mental filters can color any situation if you dwell on one detail to the detriment of others- it’s what we focus on that becomes more important. When we discount positive events, something wonderful may happen, but you think, well its not good enough or it could be better. Before something even happens or results are returned, you have decided for the worst. I recall a friend of mine said, “God has not blessed you to read minds, YET” meaning we cannot know what another person is thinking and we cannot know what lies ahead. It is much more likely to be a good event if we expect one. If you are minimizing your good qualities and magnifying your faults, who does that help? With emotional reasoning, you are allowing your feelings to color your reality. If you feel awful, maybe you have some awful condition, if you feel unloved, maybe you are unloveable. Maybe– but most likely NOT. And finally, making should statements towards yourself lead to guilt and frustration while thinking should statements towards others or the “rest of the world” lead to anger and disappointments. The only thing we “should” do is be THANKFUL. Thankful that we can reconsider what we think, thankful that we can think something new and thankful that we can recognize turning points!!!

Did you ask me, “what are the things that I have “rethought”? Are you sure you want to know?

“Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.” – Phillips Brooks

I am thinking about character- mine and others. I am thinking about what constitutes character and what limits it. What are the two great forces at work in relationships? My friend BH told me once ” if you take the money out of relationship- just watch where it goes” and ” sex is not love and love is not sex- they are not mutually exclusive- if you find both of them in one person, you are indeed fortunate- but many people find one or the other and continue their search.” I am wondering how people who spend intimate quality and quantity time together can think SO VERY DIFFERENTLY. I am wondering what part trust and communication play in every human relationship and if there is any difference between us, when all is said and done.

Is there really that much that separates us? With the DNC and the RNC playing out on TV- what is really different about the people involved? What has changed from Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, Bush and Obama– R-D-R-R-D-R-D. Would any one person be able to foresee the world events, foresee the economical changes, foresee the demographic and sociological forces, foresee and forestall and forewarn the “people”. Nope. No one thinks that clearly or that well all the time. We can only think what we will today and do what we will with the best indicators we have.

The term “true north” describe a person we find on our journey or the internal compass that helps us find direction. It is about our character and what guides us successfully through life.  It represents who you are as a human being at your deepest level. It is your orienting point – your fixed point in a spinning world – that helps you stay on track.

Scientifically, true north and magnetic north are separated by declination or the range that changes between the two based on the perpetual motion of the earth, but it is not a consistent distance from the north pole. These two can drift apart by 1200 miles, then return to 200 miles. They are an indicator- those who rely on compasses- make adjustments based on the present state and distance of true north from magnetic north.

Your True North is based on what is most important to you, your most cherished values, your passions and motivations, the sources of satisfaction in your life. Just as a compass points toward a magnetic field, your True North pulls you toward the purpose of your life. We can measure the distance, take a position, choose a direction and chart a course. Your thoughts define your True North- leading you in a direction whether you choose one or wander behind your discoveries- looking back you will see the course.

 

http://www.pbs.org/now/shows/311/true-north.html

Difference Between True North and Magnetic North | Difference Between | True North vs Magnetic North http://www.differencebetween.net/science/difference-between-true-north-and-magnetic-north/#ixzz25nCBxv8m